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Showing posts from October, 2020

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  Welcome to Natural Horror Week! Watch along when you can! Reviews will be hyperlinked throughout the week whenever possible. 25-Oct The Bay (2012) Cinemax Black Water (2007) Hoopla 26-Oct Snakes on a Plane (2006) Hulu The Devil Bat (1940) Amazon 27-Oct Frogs (1972) Amazon Slugs (1988) Amazon 28-Oct Willard (1971) Cinemax Anaconda (1997) Netflix 29-Oct Grizzly (1976) Hoopla White God (2014) Kanopy 30-Oct The Little Shop of Horrors (1960) Amazon Long Weekend (1979) Criterion 31-Oct Phenomena (1985) Amazon Arachnophobia (1990) imdbTV Upcoming Genre Weeks 11/1-11/7 Escape Films 11/8-11/14 Canuxploitation 11/15-11/21 Adventure Comedy 11/22-11/28 Family-Oriented Comedy 11/29-12/5 Workplace Comedy

Amityville Horror (2005)

  Amityville Horror (2005) RELEASED April 15, 2005 RUNTIME 90 mins  DIRECTOR Andrew Douglas  WRITERS Sandor Stern (author), George Lutz (author), Kathy Lutz (author), Scott Kosar (author), Jay Anson (author), Jonathan Gesinski (storyboard)  STARS Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, Jimmy Bennett COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIOS Platinum Dunes, Dimension Films, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, Radar Pictures  GENRES Horror Streaming on: Amazon Prime, AMC, Sling, fuboTV, Philo The plot: Ryan Reynolds pretends this wasn't already done a million times better in the '70s.  Random observations: The moving in montage music makes me want to set the alarm for 3:15am.  Baby Chloë Grace Moretz is cute. I think this is the first movie I saw where I finally allowed myself to realize that dads could be hot. The original Amityville Horror is one of my favorite movies. I saw it at a young and impressionable age and I was still very open about paranormal activity due to trauma or tragedy.  This v

Upcoming Movie Themes

  It's Haunted House Week! Last week I watched much more than I was able to review. It's October and the humidity is still 90%. Last night when I was trying to go to bed I had the window open and it was 52 degrees outside but still 75 degrees inside and the heat is turned OFF. Huzzah. If you'd like to recommend an upcoming movie or genre for me to review, please comment below!  18-Oct The Entity (1982) Starz Child's Play 3 (1991) HBO Delirium (2018) Netflix 19-Oct A Tale of Two Sisters (2003) Shudder Jessabelle (2014) Hulu Waxwork (1988) Amazon 20-Oct Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2010) Netflix House (1977) Criterion Grave Encounters (2011) Amazon 21-Oct The Changeling (1967) Shudder What Lies Beneath (2000) Showtime Let's Scare Jessica to Death (1971) Criterion 22-Oct The Messengers (2007) Amazon Winchester (2018) Netflix House (1985) Amazon 23-Oct Paranormal Activity (2009) Showtime Session 9 (2001) Netflix Book of Blood (2008) Amazon 24-Oct The Haunted Mansion

Kwaidan (1964)

  Kwaidan (1964) RELEASED December 29, 1964 RUNTIME 183 mins DIRECTOR Masaki Kobayashi  WRITERS Yoko Mizuki (screenplay), Lafcadio Hearn (novel)  STARS Rentarô Mikuni, Michiyo Aratama, Misako Watanabe COUNTRY Japan LANGUAGE Japanese  STUDIOS Bungei, Toho Company, Ltd., Ninjin Club, Toyo Kogyo Kabushiki Kaisha  GENRES Drama, Fantasy, Horror Streaming on: Criterion, HBOMax The plot: An anthology of four folk tales with supernatural themes. Random observations: There are many moments where the sets seem like living paintings. Theydies and Gentlethems, I give you Gothic Rashomon.  I love anthologies. <3 Well, I'm ashamed to say it, but this is a first watch for me. It's been on my to-see list for as long as I can remember, but somehow it kept slipping through my fingers.  This film is very much style over substance, but the style is unlike anything else. This is the ASMR of horror films.  Also, this puppy is now on the list of one of the best films I've ever seen.  1/1 Direc

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962) RELEASED October 31, 1962 RUNTIME 135 mins DIRECTOR Robert Aldrich  WRITERS Lukas Heller (screenplay), Robert Altman (dialogue), Henry Farrell (novel)  STARS Bette Davis, Joan Crawford, Victor Buono COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIO Associates & Aldrich Company, The  GENRES Drama, Thriller, Horror Streaming on: Hoolpa, Criterion The plot: Two aging actresses live as recluses in an old Hollywood mansion. Basically what starts as Gypsy ends as Grey Gardens. Random observations: I want their mansion. I've heard people complain about the score being too melodramatic, but I found it unimposing. Apparently, Joan Crawford insisted on having Blanche's hair and nails perfect as well as her costumes pressed. Bette Davis argued that someone who had been a recluse for 20 years wouldn't have any of these traits and that Crawford had "made a mistake".  It's been a pretty minute since I had watched this film, but I thi

Upcoming Movie Themes

It's Horror Week! I missed posting last night because I was busy with a fibromyalgia flare, but that'll happen sometimes. I'm adjusting this week's schedule to 4 movies per day. Chronic pain will sadly dictate the amount of time I can dedicate to brainpower.  If you'd like to recommend an upcoming theme or a movie to review within an upcoming theme, please comment below! 11-Oct The Last Man on Earth (1964) Hoopla Black Sabbath (1963) Kanopy Theater of Blood (1973) Roku Inferno (1980) Vudu 12-Oct Sante Sangre (1989) Kanopy Blood and Black Lace (1964) Amazon The Host (2006) Hoopla The Unknown (1927) Criterion 13-Oct Sleepy Hollow (1999) Netflix Angel Heart (1987) HBO Dead of Night (1945) Kanopy Train to Busan (2016) TubiTV 14-Oct Audition (1999) Shudder Scanners (1981) Kanopy The Changeling (1980) Shudder Zombi 2 (1979) Shudder 15-Oct Kwaidan (1964) Criterion Vampyr (1932) Criterion Jacob's Ladder (1990) Cinemax The

Dr. Terror's House of Horrors (1965)

  Dr. Terror's House of Horrors (1965) RELEASED February 28, 1965 RUNTIME 98 mins DIRECTOR Freddie Francis  WRITER Milton Subotsky (screenplay)  STARS Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, Neil McCallum COUNTRY United Kingdom LANGUAGE English  STUDIOS Paramount, Amicus Productions GENRES Horror Streaming on: TubiTV, Popcornflix The plot: A group of five strangers gets their tarot cards read, resulting in a 5-part anthology. Random observations: This film marks the theatrical movie debut of Roy Castle (Biff Bailey). First in a row of anthologies to be put out by Amicus. Donald Sutherland is a BABY!!!!!! The atmosphere of Amicus films is always charming to me. I love the color palettes and the quaint coziness of UK horror.  With a total running time of 98 minutes, it's hard to get any depth in any of the five mini-stories. It's probably something that could have been adjusted rather easily, but oh well. I'm not quite sure why the title says "House" of Horrors, when th

Teen Wolf Too (1987)

  Teen Wolf Too (1987) RELEASED November 20, 1987 RUNTIME 95 mins DIRECTOR Christopher Leitch  WRITERS Jeph Loeb (characters), Matthew Weisman (characters), Tim Kring (screenplay)  STARS Jason Bateman, Kim Darby, John Astin COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIO Atlantic Entertainment Group  GENRES Comedy, Fantasy, Family Streaming on: Hoopla The plot: Jason Bateman plays Todd, cousin of Michael J. Fox's character from the first film. First world problems plague Todd at his new college, but then things get wolfy, and his popularity starts to rise. BUT AT WHAT COST? Random observations: Voted #85 of IMDb's Bottom Rated Movies Jason Bateman's film debut and he's lucky it wasn't his finale. Michael J. Fox turned down the chance to reprise his role mostly because he didn't want to go through the hours of makeup application Well, those were more like random facts today as opposed to random observations, but whatever. Jason Bateman is super charming, but he ca

Ginger Snaps Back: The Beginning (2004)

Ginger Snaps Back: The Beginning (2004) RELEASED July 10, 2004 RUNTIME 94 mins  DIRECTOR Grant Harvey  WRITERS Stephen Massicotte (screenplay), Christina Ray (screenplay)  STARS Katharine Isabelle, Emily Perkins, Nathaniel Arcand COUNTRY Canada LANGUAGE English  STUDIOS 49 Film, Lions Gate Films  GENRES Drama, Horror Streaming on: TubiTV, Tribeca Shortlist, Amazon Prime The plot: Ginger and Brigette are back in what feels like either REALLY GOOD fan fiction or REALLY BAD prequel-ing. Set in 19th Century Canada for no particular reason, sisters again are doin' it for themselves after Ginger gets bitten by a werewolf (AGAIN!). Random observations: This was shot back-to-back with Ginger Snaps 2: Unleashed (2004) and it feels like Gs2 got slightly more attention. I wish Emily Perkins and Katherine Isabelle would do a Ginger Snaps TV series. It's time! The sound levels are super weird.  Disjointed in plot and dialogue, Ginger Snaps Back: The Beginning is a hot mess. Emily Perkins an

Deadtime Stories (1986)

Deadtime Stories (1986) RELEASED November 28, 1986 RUNTIME 93 mins DIRECTOR Jeffrey Delman  WRITERS Jeffrey Delman, J. Edward Kiernan, Charles F. Shelton  STARS Scott Valentine, Nicole Picard, Matt Mitler COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIOS Overseas FilmGroup, Scary Stuff  GENRES Horror, Comedy Streaming on: TubiTV, Hoopla, Shout TV, FlixFling, Amazon The plot: An uncle who has no business being around children at all is left to babysit his nephew. He regales him with 3 different bedtime fairy tales most likely scarring the poor kid for life. I hope he didn't get paid.  Random observations:  Deadtime Stories still has a Facebook page, although they haven't posted since 2019 when a special edition vinyl of the soundtrack was released.  All the special effects in this movie were done in-camera. This film is like what happens if you order The Princess Bride on Wish. A half-assed anthology using bastardized fairy tales. The soundtrack is the best thing about this. Melis

Monster Dog (1984)

Monster Dog (1984) RELEASED December 1, 1984 VHS June 15, 1986 RUNTIME 84 mins DIRECTOR Claudio Fragasso  WRITERS Rossella Drudi (screenplay), Claudio Fragasso (screenplay)  STARS Alice Cooper, Victoria Vera, Carlos Santurio  COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE Spanish; Castilian STUDIOS Continental Motion Pictures, M&C Films, Royal Films  GENRES Horror Streaming on: TubiTV The plot: A dubbed Alice Cooper plays a rockstar named Victor Raven who angers locals when his presence seems to be responsible for the return of a scary pupper who killed his parents.  Random observations: Alice Cooper kind of has a weird mullet in this, which often undermines his acting -- which despite being dubbed by another actor, is still quite impressive. Half of this movie has the blue glow of the Total Eclipse of the Heart video and therefore gives me a sense memory of comfort. Alice Cooper's eyeshadow likes to change color and intensity within scenes. It's pretty magnificent. I kind of wish this wer

The Werewolf (1956)

  The Werewolf (1956) RELEASED July 1, 1956 RUNTIME 79 mins  DIRECTOR Fred F. Sears  WRITERS Robert E. Kent (screenplay), James B. Gordon (story)  STARS Don Megowan, Joyce Holden, Eleanore Tanin COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIO Clover Productions  GENRES Science Fiction, Horror Streaming on: Crackle The plot: A stranger arrives in town at the onset of a bunch of murders. The town doctor and his daughter try to figure shit out.  Random observations: At the beginning of this film, the narrator states that lycanthropy is both the ability to turn into a werewolf AND the ability to turn OTHERS into werewolves? Whaaaaaaaaaat? Maybe they mean during an attack, but they made it sound like they could just walk up to anyone and be like "What's up? You're a werewolf now."  Jesus, Crackle has a shit ton of commercials. This werewolf rolls around on the ground a lot.  This movie is only 79 minutes long, but because of all of the commercials on Crackle, I started it a

Cry of the Werewolf (1944)

Cry of the Werewolf (1944) RELEASED August 17, 1944 RUNTIME 63 mins  DIRECTOR Henry Levin  WRITERS Charles O'Neal (screenplay), Griffin Jay (screenplay)  STARS Nina Foch, Stephen Crane, Osa Massen COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIO Columbia Pictures GENRES Horror Streaming on: YouTube The plot: A young Romani woman turns into a wolf because that's the coolest fucking way to destroy your enemies. Random observations:  There aren't enough female werewolf movies Come on, Hollywood! (Or Pittsburgh!) The ones that we have are great, but they don't come out often enough. #gimmemoregingersnaps This film marks the first appearance of a female as a werewolf in a talkie! WTG, Nina Foch! (You might remember her from An American in Paris.) The setting is in New Orleans, Louisiana but is very recognizable as a Hollywood backlot.  Twice-married-to Lana Turner leading man Stephen Crane is really the only actual terrible thing about this movie. It often feels like he's

The Mad Monster (1942)

  The Mad Monster (1942) RELEASED May 15, 1942 RUNTIME 77 mins  DIRECTOR Sam Newfield  WRITER Fred Myton (screenplay)  STARS Johnny Downs, George Zucco, Anne Nagel  COUNTRY United States LANGUAGE English  STUDIO Sigmund Neufeld Productions GENRES Horror Streaming on: Amazon Prime, Epix, FlixFling, TubiTV, Sling TV, DIRECTV The plot: A simple-minded handyman (who can only be described as "the obvious inspiration for Torgo") gets turned into a revenge exacting werewolf by a mad scientist. Random observations: After watching 1921's Destiny directed by Fritz Lang this morning, it's quite noticeable that the film quality of this movie has degraded greatly since the '40s and could do with a facelift. However, part of the charm of the early 40's b-movies of this budget lies in the imperfections themselves.  If you watch this film on Amazon, please note that there are no closed captions available. The soundscape of this film is akin to an arctic wolf sanctuary ASMR fa

Upcoming Movie Themes

  Welcome to Werewolf Week! Below is my watch schedule for 10/4-10/10. Feel free to watch along. Reviews will be hyperlinked throughout the week when possible. (I always watch all the films, but my chronic pain doesn't always let me have enough brainpower to write a mini-review.) At the bottom of the list is the upcoming genre schedule. If you have a film you'd like me to review (it MUST be available on at least one subscription streaming service), please leave a comment below! 4-Oct Blood (1973) TubiTV Face of the Screaming Werewolf (1964) Amazon Chabelo and Pepito vs. the Monsters (1973) TubiTV The Mad Monster (1942) Amazon Howling VI: The Freaks (1991) TubiTV 5-Oct The Howling IV: The Original Nightmare (1988) TubiTV Monster Dog (1984) TubiTV Scream of the Wolf (1974) Amazon The Beast of the Yellow Night (1971) Amazon 6-Oct Wolfman (1979) Amazon The Werewolf of Washington (1973) TubiTV Moon of the Wolf (1972) Amazon Dr. Terror's Gallery of Horro